Thanks Oprah.

So schoooooooooool's out for Summah!  I'm excited because that means now I have time to write.  Today was my first full day off and I've already been researching over the weekend, re-reading what I've already written, and written another thousand words or so. 

My goal is to complete the book, editing and all, by the end of the summer and then figure out what I'm going to do with it.  I'm already leaning toward self-publishing but specifically e-publishing.  It's the quickest, cheapest, easiest way to get my book "out there" and see what happens.  I have no delusions of grandeur but I am hopeful that people will like it. 

I want to write.  I like to write.  I like storytelling.  And it would be totally cool if I could make a little money doing that. 

So Oprah's last show is tomorrow and while I've never felt one way or the other about Oprah, I've begun to get surprisingly sentimental about her "leaving."  I mean, yeah, she has her own network so she's not really going anywhere but on the shows this season people have said what an impact her show has made on them and how she's been such a staple or fixture for TV for 25 years.  I had to agree. I guess since my high school days she was always there on TV when I got home and then all through college.  She's been there, doing her thing more than half my life.  She's done some pretty amazing things and inspired a lot of people.  It's truly impressive and amazing to see how many lives she's touched and changed.  But what's been most resounding in my life and one of the many things she's always professed along her "journey," is that one needs to always be his or her own true "authentic self."  So that's all I'm trying to do with my writing.  I feel a need to write. 

I've read that some writers feel "most at home" when they're writing or feel like they have something to say and need to write because of that or they want to make a difference or make people feel stuff or think differently.  I have none of those lofty aspirations.  I think I write to entertain myself and I think it would be awesome if I could actually entertain someone else with my writing too.  I do not feel "most at home" when I'm writing at all!  It's hard! It's challenging.  Sometimes I'm hating what I'm writing.  And I so can be Queen of Procrastination!  I want to write but sometimes I'm totally lazy about it.  Most of the time I'm totally lazy about it.  Since I've begun this book, it's like I try to find other things to do purposely so that I don't go write.  I'll clean, sleep, watch very stupid reality TV, play mindless games on the iPad or Facebook instead of doing the thing I most want to do and be good at.  It's quite possible that I'm afraid of not being good at it.  But I hate cowards.  And I certainly don't want to be one so I must press on, come what may.  Right?

Anyway, what I'm saying is my writing will likely not have major impact in anyone's life.  And that's okay.  This is just me being my authentic self!  When I write, I'm writing from the authentically "me" part of me.  When I'm writing, I am authentically me.  And, quite honestly, it's taken me a long time to realize that this is what I really want to do "when I grow up"!